It's 2:30 am and all I hear right now is the roar of the wind outside behind the velvety voice of Imogen Heap drifting out of the speakers. Lately I marvel at how far I've come in my life. I am pleasantly surprised by a lot of things lately. I try not to think of what I've missed because I am moving ever forward. In the darkest corners of my mind rest the old scars and painful memories. However, they are so far away now. They do not ache so much if they cross my mind. It took so long for me to realize how big the world is and how insignificant the rest can be.
The older I get, the less tolerance I have for folks who rub me the wrong way. What I mean to say is, I do not waste my compassion, time, and energy on people who would take advantage of me in any shape or form. I maybe a quiet sort of girl but I am always observing others. I like to watch people period. I connect the dots with everything I observe. I'd like to think I've been touched with a bit of preternatural intuition. That is to say I try not to past judgment hastily. (To say I do not judge people would be a lie because that is one of the most human of flaws.) I can be unkind. I have severed friendships in the past. I severed all ties with my ex-boyfriends promptly after the dissolution of their respective relationships. But it was all done from sound judgment and knowing what was best for me as a person. I used to be a doormat for others once upon a time, always giving the benefit of the doubt and not listening to my instincts. I haven't stopped looking for the good in people though. I'm just much more guarded and calculating till I find that I can open up the trust.
Well Sonic has commandeered my space because clearly I am not paying enough attention to him. I guess that is all for tonight. As soon as I can sneak away from this cat, I'll make up that Black Bean Salad so it can chill all day before dinner. (It's a recipe Mama Jo has. So delish and I do recommend.)